Alyssa: [00:00:00] When you listen to the deepest part of you that is screaming to be heard, there's gold there. Yeah. So when we stifle that, then we fit into these boxes that we're not meant to be in. Yeah. When you sit with yourself and listen, the answers come right up. Listening can take you far. 

Malaika: Welcome to Happy Medium, a podcast where artists make art on the spot while creating art. With host me Malika Hollist, we chat on topics like the days of doodling in their diary, how self-love gave them confidence, or on building a successful art career using only old boxes. This podcast made by W U S F Public Media is about one's journey to finding self through a creative medium. 

Malaika: Alyssa Marie made her way to St. Petersburg, Florida from Colorado with one goal [00:01:00] to follow her heart and become a full-time artist. She speaks with us today on how finding a career in art was a calling that she found from really listening to herself and believing that she could create the life that she wanted. 

Alyssa: My name is Alyssa Marie and I am a full-time oil painter and muralist. I moved to St. Pete about seven years ago from Denver, Colorado and have been living as a full-time artist since. 

Malaika: Thank you so much for coming in today and painting with us. 

Alyssa: Absolutely. 

Malaika: Painting with a painter, which is fun. So you've always been into art. 

Malaika: Um, so what does art mean to you? 

Alyssa: Oh gosh, what a big question. Yeah. Art is, The most pure form of expression, I believe, in all forms, whether that's music or painting or, um, gosh, clay, acting, dancing. Mm-hmm. When you express yourself in art, you are putting your truest self out to the world, right? So that's what art means to me. 

Alyssa: It's just sharing myself in the [00:02:00] biggest way that I possibly can. 

Malaika: When did you know you wanted to be an artist? Has it always just been in you? 

Alyssa: It has. I have known from a very young age. I think it was probably when I started taking art classes mm-hmm. In school. Mm-hmm. And I, I kind of stood out with my excitement for it, and my projects were a little bit more advanced. 

Alyssa: Yeah. And I was like, Ooh. I love this. Yeah. Yeah. So from a really, really young age, I, I loved it. And I remember I have a little book that I did that my parents got me about future goals when I was seven years old. Oh. And it said, what do you wanna be when you grow up? And I said, A professional artist. I spelled artist wrong, of course, but I was gonna be a professional artist, so I claimed it when I was seven. 

Malaika: So what was it like pursuing art back when you were still in Colorado and you were a teen and. You know, you couldn't make it your career yet. Right. But you were excited about it, right. 

Alyssa: Really what it looked like was it just filled a lot of my free time. Mm-hmm. And when I did have the chance to dip into it specifically in like [00:03:00] my classes in school, yeah. 

Alyssa: I would just soak that up. I remember when I would get to art class and I would sit down and I would immediately immerse myself. Yeah. And so I think that, In my moments of designated art artistic space, I just made sure that I was as present as possible. Yeah. To really soak it up. Cuz I didn't care as much about math class or about. 

Alyssa: Right. Yeah. You just really enjoyed it. Other classes, but yeah. Um, yeah, I just, I, I caught myself asking for. Different, um, artistic mediums for holidays, you know, Christmas presents and birthdays. Mm-hmm. I would ask for anything. I didn't care what it was, if it was pastels or paints or, or drawing materials. 

Alyssa: Yeah. Uh, clay sewing. It didn't matter. I just wanted to express myself creatively. Yeah. I didn't really know. I had no idea that I was going to kind of mold myself into painting specifically at that time. Right. But I was just experimenting with everything. I knew right out of high school I wanted to be a fine artist. 

Alyssa: Mm-hmm. I knew it, [00:04:00] but there was no, there wasn't a lot of support for that idea in my life at the time. Mm-hmm. And even though my parents were extremely supportive of my artistic pursuits as I was younger. Right. They wanted, they were hopeful that I would go to college for something 

that would make me a little more money, a little more substantial in the art scene, you know, the starving artist stigma is heavy. It's thick. It very much still exists in people's minds and um, so long story short, I ended up choosing a path down, uh, graphic design. Mm-hmm. So I went for my bachelor's in communication design with an emphasis on fine art. Now I will say, even though stepping into a graphic design role for a few years after college didn't end up being my calling, I use my degree every single day. 

Alyssa: Right. To this day, even though I'm a full-time fine artist mm-hmm. I use it on the backend of so much that I do now. Yeah. 

Malaika: So what was the change that made you decide, okay, [00:05:00] actually I don't wanna do this, I want to do fine arts. And then you came to Florida. How did that all occur? 

Alyssa: Oh, I'll never forget it. I was working as a graphic designer for a big, big time mortgage company. 

Alyssa: Yeah. I had a beautiful suite looking over Denver Tech Center, which is right a little bit, um, south of downtown Denver. Yeah. And it's beautiful. I mean, anyone's dream out of college, right? I had my headphones in. At a computer, at a desk, it was so quiet. I was sitting there thinking to myself, This is not me. 

Alyssa: This is just totally not me. Yeah. I cannot, I can't sit still in this way. Yeah. This is not the right way to be expressing my truest, deepest part of my soul. Mm-hmm. And so that was the moment I, I'll never forget it. I was sitting in my computer, you know, fulfilling all the needs of all the graphic design needs for the business cards Yeah. 

Alyssa: And the marketing materials that people needed at the time. And I was great at it. Yeah. You know, and I, I really, I did like it. I liked what I did. I loved text layout and things like that, but, um, I went [00:06:00] on, uh, I think Craigslist at the time or maybe Facebook marketplace, and I just started looking up home rentals in Florida and I was like, I'm moving to the water. 

Alyssa: I found a place here, um, in Pinellas Park. I'm still there. It was a three day drive to get here from Colorado. And on that entire drive, half the time I didn't even have music on because that's how loud I was in my head about this new rebranding I was gonna be doing. Yeah. Of myself. Yeah. And I mean, there was complete conviction for that. 

Alyssa: Like non-negotiable. I was going to come to Florida and be a full-time fine artist. When you listen to the deepest part of you that is screaming to be heard, there's gold. There's gold there. Yeah. To fit a mold is one of the biggest disservices we can do for ourselves because we're all here as unique individuals with a really, really one of a kind calling. 

Alyssa: Yes. And so when we stifle that, then we fit into these boxes that we're not meant to be in. Yeah. So listening can take you far.[00:07:00] 

Malaika: We hope you are enjoying Happy Medium. Our podcast is made in collaboration with W U S F, Public Media, Arts Axis Florida, and the NPR Network. Arts Axis Florida is your online destination for finding content on all things are going on in your area. Go to Arts Axis, that's A X I S florida.org to learn more and find all Happy Medium podcast episodes. 

Malaika: It is hard to make it as an artist. So do you feel like your ability to know yourself has helped lend you to do that? 

Alyssa: Well, this is how I'm gonna combat that question. I don't think it's hard to make it as an artist. Don't think it's hard. I think that it is just like any other entrepreneurial endeavor. I just happen to think that due to many, many years of history proving to us that most fine artists don't make a living until they've passed. 

Alyssa: [00:08:00] That has created a stigma now in young ones. That is hard to do it. Exactly that. Oh, I'm not a hundred years old, so I'm not gonna sell a painting yet. That is so false. And especially now with the help of social media, right? My goodness. You put your mind to it and it's a business just like anything else, and you acquire skill and talent for it just like anything else. 

Alyssa: As you commit to your own growth within that, you just keep doing it. Just like any, if you wanted to go open a bakery, if you wanted to. Open a school. Right. If you wanted to start, you know, an organization of any kind, right. You, you wouldn't think twice it twice about it. 

Malaika: You just keep at it. 

Alyssa: Yeah. Yeah. And you do the things like I, if you looked at my painting starting out versus my paintings now. Mm-hmm. My goodness. The difference in them. But that was because I really committed to my craft and I took workshops and I took classes and Right. I put myself in the communities that were gonna help support me. Right. You know, there's some hard times, there's 

hard years, uh, especially once you enter the full-time realm, cuz in the beginning, I had [00:09:00] freelance, uh, graphic design jobs on the side that I could always lean on for additional income. 

Alyssa: Well, I remember when I ended, I was, I was doing part-time nannying and the freelance graphic design jobs right when I moved to Florida. In addition to painting my butt off to try to be a full-time fine artist. Yeah. And I remember the day that I put in my two weeks with the nanny family and I gave I, I told my last freelance graphic design client that that was the last project I was gonna take on for them. 

Alyssa: Now you wanna talk about terrifying. Yeah. That was terrifying. The safety net, not having it the safety net. Yeah. Releasing that little bit of security that I knew I could count on. I knew I still had a consistent money coming in every two weeks, and I was completely letting that go. 

Malaika: So art is your career. It's what you do, it's what you do to make a living, but it's also how you express yourself as a person. How are you able to balance your art and enjoy it for work, but also still enjoy it for yourself? 

Alyssa: [00:10:00] Oh, another does that another great question. Yeah. Yes, and And it's something that so many people told me. 

Alyssa: It was very difficult when I started out and I, and I, I made the claim I was gonna be a full-time fine artist and I started telling people, this is what I'm gonna do. Way before I was doing it, this is back when I had the nanny job and the graphic design job, my parents were probably terrified for me. 

Alyssa: You know? Yeah. But I knew it, and so many people said to me, don't make it your full-time job because you'll resent it. Right. You'll despise it. And I didn't know at the time if that was gonna be true or not. Yeah. And that was scary. Cause I was like, this is my favorite thing. I love it. Yeah, no pressure. So this is what I would say to that. 

Alyssa: I did have years where I lost myself. I, I lost myself because I would take on so many commissioned painting jobs of subject matter that I probably didn't really wanna be doing. Mm-hmm. Um, pieces that I knew weren't going to light me up [00:11:00] inside, but I took them anyway mostly for the money. Yeah. Because I was trying to find my way and I still had bills to pay and rent and Right. 

Alyssa: You know, dogs to feed and all that, but, Along the way, I would essentially, I would have so much resistance because you can feel it inside you when you're doing something you don't wanna be doing. Yeah. And when you don't feel like doing it and it's the thing you love doing the most, nothing twists you up inside more than that. 

Alyssa: Yeah. And so I would just really listen to even that. So I would listen to the low notes as much as I would listen to the high notes. Yeah. And I would say, okay. This isn't good. I haven't been myself for a month or two months, and I would say, what needs to switch? And then naturally I would like process of elimination. 

Alyssa: I would just start to think I. How can I be more efficient, where I'm making money, but I'm doing something that I really wanna be doing, and that would just change things specifically in the way that I worked. Yeah. It would be maybe I'm charging a little [00:12:00] bit more so that I'm not taking on so many jobs. 

Alyssa: You know, more people are saying no, but I'm able to get the jobs I really want. Right? What if I fine tune my subject matter? And that's exactly what I did. Mm-hmm. I said, I'm gonna stop taking these commissions. And I'm gonna start taking nautical subject matter. Yeah. And that made me happier. And so these little things of sitting with myself, really listening to myself and listening to why is it that I feel so much resistance within me right now? 

Alyssa: And what can I do to make myself feel better? And you always have the answers. Yeah. When you sit with yourself and listen, the answers come right up. Mm-hmm. If you're, if you're too much into like talking to everybody and telling, sharing. Sometimes it gets overwhelming. Yeah. And you don't even know what's right from left anymore. 

Alyssa: Yeah. But when you just relax and breathe and step away and look at it all like it's in a bubble. Yeah. And it's detached from you. That's when you say, oh, that's not working. And that does work. And maybe if I do a little more of that and a little less of that now I am only doing passion jobs. [00:13:00] Yes. Every single job that I do is a passion piece. 

Alyssa: Whether that's an oil painting, a mural, it doesn't matter. My involvement with the community. Because I cared so much about keeping it to things I love. 

Malaika: My last question is for you is who is Alyssa today? 

Alyssa: Ooh. Alyssa today is the most authentic Alyssa that's ever been that I knew I was capable of being when I was. 

Alyssa: Yeah. You know, 10 years old doodling hibiscus flowers and dolphins living in the mountains, like Yeah. On my notebooks. And the, the part of you that knows that your most, the, the brightest part of you is possible. Yeah. And, and, and it can be that way consistently all the time. Spreading that just onto everybody you meet. 

Alyssa: Mm-hmm. That's the Alyssa today. So she's just a thriving, buzzing. Full-time fine artist. 

Malaika: Yay. We love it. [00:14:00] Yay. Thank you guys for being here, and we'll see you in the next episode. 

Malaika: Thank you for listening to Happy Medium. You can find more info about the guest and other episodes in the show notes below, or go to our website, arts axis florida.org. Thank you to our sponsors, Community Foundation, Tampa Bay, building a vibrant, prosperous community through transformative vision, leadership, and philanthropy at cftampabay.org. 

Malaika: And the Gobioff Foundation supporting human rights organizations and the Tampa Florida arts community at gobofffoundation.org. Lastly, thank you to PRX for consulting on this podcast, the Arts Axis Florida team, and the Florida Department of State Divisions of Arts and Culture for making these episodes possible. 

Malaika: Copyright 2023 W U S F. Public Media.[00:15:00] 

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